Falling pregnant was the biggest shock and miracle for me. When I was 18 I was misdiagnosed with Thyroid Cancer, (not something I speak about really) but I would like to highlight the misdiagnosed bit, I was VERY lucky. This did however leave me without a thyroid gland. A few months later a consultant in London told me I may struggle to conceive. When you are 18 years old this is still hard to take, however at that age I could take it or leave it as I wasn’t ready to have children.
As the years went by I did carry these words around with me subconsciously. I told my now husband when we first met that I may not be able to have children, and he supported me 100%.
When I was in my mid 20's I was diagnosed with Endometriosis which is very common. (Endometriosis is a condition where the tissue that lines the womb (endometrium) is found outside the womb, such as in the ovaries and fallopian tubes.) I did undergo an operation to remove most of it, however this put extra worry and pressure on me, as I was told it could affect my ability to conceive. To be honest after this I didn't think I would have a hope in hell conceiving.
Sure enough when my hubby and I decided we wanted to try for a baby, my expectations were pretty low, but you don’t know until you try! I kept a positive attitude and an open mind. Much to my amazement after 6 months we fell pregnant! I couldn’t believe it! After the shock settled down, I became a nervous wreck. I thought this was my one and only chance of having a baby so I had to make it work. Sadly all the worrying in the world and eating all the “right” things couldn’t have stopped us having a miscarriage at 6.5 weeks. I was absolutely devastated as I thought that was our only chance. At this point I felt pretty low and angry, I needed some time out and we stopped “trying”.
Several months later we moved into our first home. We were so preoccupied with moving that making a baby was no longer our priority…and that’s when is happened! A few days of being in our new home we fell pregnant! Again I was super shocked, I called my husband straight away to tell him the news (on reflection this wasn’t the best idea as he had to ride a push bike home from work in shock, sorry!).
This time round I was on edge for about the first 24 weeks of my pregnancy. What I had learnt from having a miscarriage previously is that there wasn’t anything I could have done, it wasn’t my fault. After the 24 week mark I started to relax and embrace being pregnant. I had lots of scans throughout because I don’t have a thyroid so I was constantly reassured. I loved feeling her movements, and knowing that my amazing body was creating a little life! I had to trust my body and my mind.
Our little lady was born 4 days before her due date, she was healthy and is just perfect! Every single day I have to pinch myself as I can’t believe she’s my reality.
Thanks for taking the time to read my story K X